My friend Donna rapped on my door one night as I sat down to read the paper before dinner.
She stood in the drizzle of rain mixed with twilight, her face barely visible under a hooded sweatshirt.
Just for a bit of conversation she said.
I was delighted!
I crave the kind of friendship that sees no clock or circumstance, that just wants to come and share for a small while.
When she left, another friend called and asked to come over. She wanted us to tweak a brochure I had made for her on my computer.
She came. We tweaked.
And then we talked over freshly-brewed mocha cappuccinos.
Yum… both the mochas and the friendships.
I didn’t have much dinner that night, and I didn’t miss it!
I was filled by the company of two friends who are genuine and who uplifted me with their impromptu visits.
That they wanted to stop by somehow validated me and I felt good. Right or wrong…
Do unexpected visits from friends interrupt your day? Or uplift them? Or both?
Have some coffee. Mochas and frappacinos and bottled water are all available. 
And share your thoughts…….
Barb
Image © Forestpath | Dreamstime.com
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
Hi Barb,
I am no longer blogging, but I really do love your posts (rss Google reader). Wish I lived close to you so I could be a drop in friend. I rarely get a phone call and never a drop in. I envy you.
Carol
Oh I do! Anyone who can go into the kitchen and fix herself a snack is welcome anytime! Others too, but I am a real mess at being a host: my pantry is usually bare!
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Thank you Carol!
Today people rush to do their day, and it’s a rare thing to have drop-ins anymore. That’s why this story stands out to me. It just felt — well, nice.
Growing up, all my parents’ siblings lived fairly close by. Everyone came home (their own) for dinner and evening activities. (Not much TV back then.)
And Sundays were for church, dinner at a grandma’s house or our own, and then visits. We’d go (and get ice cream cones on the way or the way back), or someone else would drive by to sit on our front porch for a spell. And we kids would play…
It was just a quieter time. I like not-so-frantic… I wish too that you could pop over. What do you do in place of your blog? And do you miss the process?
This post was so nice. I could really envision that happening. I have two young kids so that really does not happen. But i do enjoy the last minutes plans I make to get together with a friend. They really do life me up!
Thanks for the nice thooughts!
No one seems to drop by any more, although for about 15 minutes yesterday an old friend came by to get some applesauce to take to her friends at the beach – 2 nice gestures.
I do like working in the yard because on the weekends usually there is a connection at least with another neighbor in their yard – a little over the fence chat.
Lovely memories Barb.
I want to add, that several folks are going to continue writing and turn in pieces by the 15th of June…I know one about the positives in her family with a divorce….a wedding bloopers story, and yours…I still have the prize money and the judges said just lets see what comes and who reads the fine print.
I would love it! Trying to write 47 posts before my walking tour of Scotland seems might big at this end of the trip!
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Funny how different people in different countries view impromptu visits differently. Some people feel the need to call or be called before dropping by or letting people in. The open door policy does not apparently work everywhere. Enduring friendships enrich lives, regardless of how often people connect.
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Ahhh Barb, You have such a way with words. You write only a few here, yet with them you evoke such lovely and poignant images and memories. I can write technical explanations quite well as you know, but the gift of memorable prose does not seem to be mine. I do however enjoy reading yours so very much. Keep at it girl!
Elaina
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Hi Elaina! Thank you, girl friend. Yes, you do write technical stuff so anyone right-brained or left can understand and follow. I’m looking forward to learning to assemble collage art in Corel Painter, under your terrific knowledge of the program.
I’m so glad you stopped by for a chat — I always keep wrapped dark chocolates in a bowl, you know. Help yourself.
Hi Brooke — those last minute plans you mention are a treat, aren’t they? Like a wrapped gift you suddenly find thrust into your hands. I agree.
With two kids, you probably have a refrigerator calendar that’s ink and color filled to not-much-white-space left.
I think that’s why coffee- or cocktail-time breaks are so special to me. Short. Good conversation. But not demanding too much of anyone’s time.
Thank you for coming.
Hi Patricia… over the back yard fence — how I love the memories that phrase brings up. Thank you.
A walking tour through Scotland? Oh! Can I go with you? How I’d love to do something like that — or even bike part way. (Bicycle, not motor bike.)
I’ll be in touch regarding my article… thanks.
Hi Liara — you’re so right. Even here, today, open doors are not readily available. Just between very good friends and/or neighbors.
Mostly people are gone. Busy doing other stuff.
I love your last sentence — how true!
Dropping in without calling is a dying art. I guess it has something to do with people wanting to present perfect sides of themselves to others all the time. But so love friends who just drop in.
Hi Sanjay. A dying art — I like that term. And yes, you’re right — I once had a “friend” who would have inspected. That I don’t need — ever! I don’t have a lot of clutter, but leave my closet doors closed, thank you. Hahaha!
My aunt had a seaside hotel. I used to love going there. She sat like a queen bee in the middle of her ‘hive’, everything buzzing with life around her and she had a hug for everyone. It was all completely chaotic. One time she decided to tidy a large cupboard in her sitting room. She pulled out the jumble of contents, then somebody rang at the door. Bundling the stuff even more higgledy piggledy back into the cupboard, she hurried to greet some new guests. Returning she surveyed the bulging cupboard door and remarked with a sigh of satisfaction. “Ah! Thank goodness I got that done. I’ve been meaning to tidy that cupboard for ages.”
All this was so different from my home, where everything was spotless and organised and nobody would have dreamed of dropping in unannounced.
Unfortunately I have taken after my mother. I love to have things planned to look forward to, but impromptu visits throw me. Oh how I wish I lived in a creative chaos! Alas, I adore to organise and plan.
…Oh well. It takes all sorts…
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Hi Valerie.
What a delightful story! (You tell them so well.)
Thank God for the organizers in our lives. Chaos is only fun if I know it’s temporary. (I like it all cleaned up when it’s over.)
Thanks, Barbara, for stopping by my blog for a “visit” and your very kind comments. Your thoughts this morning are good ones….sometimes we get too busy for the things that are so important.
Especially as an artist, used to working in solitude.
I just had an unexpected “visit” from my five year old grandson, to whom I opened up both arms wide for his visit and he beamed with joy at me…….
May we never be too busy for the important things in life.
Hi Bunny... it’s always a pleasure to visit your site. You know I admire your talent with watercolors.
I too like to work in the quiet — whether there are friends nearby or not. I’m usually the one with my lips closed. And as I paint, even with lively conversation all around me, I don’t hear what’s being said. It’s a strange and wonderful phenomenon working from within the right brain only. The nearby sounds fade as distance chatter of birds or train whistles. Sounds. But nothing specific. I love it!
And I so relate to stooping down with arms wide and welcoming for our little ones. We are blessed…
Thanks so much for coming by.
I love your reply to Valerie’s wonderful story……”chaos is only fun if I know it’s temporary”! Oh, we’re cut from the same cloth, for sure. I’m delighted if someone comes by on an impromptu visit, but I have a hard time doing that myself to someone. Hmmm…wonder why? Our favorite “social occasions” are when friends call us (or we call them) and say, “Hey! We just caught some fish and have the grill stoked up…..have you eaten yet?” And off we go with a bottle of wine and spend hours of unplanned time of fantastic conversation. Delicious, delightful “interruptions” to the day can be very healing!
Hey Neets! I love your “favorite social occasions”! And quite agree. In a perfect world, as the commercial goes……………………
Hey — want to grill some salmon steaks tonight? Oh wait — come by tomorrow night, when the mulching and annuals-planting are done.
Or better yet, come and help. We’ll open the wine early. Haha!
Hi Barb. I prefer to be expecting people. And it’s funny because when I was younger, my mother would just drop in on her friends and all was well. I would always call a friend to make sure my dropping by wouldn’t be interrupting their plans. And now that I work from home, during the week I would be less accepting of a surprise visit, than on the weekend.
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I must admit, I’m probably guilt of rushing a friendship in order to get back to work. I’m sorry I do this. Sometimes the pressure of getting the job done is overwhelming.
However, I have a feeling that if I were to meet you unexpectedly, I’d love sitting down for a cup of coffee. Are you coming to CA anytime soon………………..:)
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I don’t get many visitors since living here. I can remember a time I loved people dropping by. Since becoming reclusive my first reaction is dread, but generally once I start having a real conversation I end up wondering what it was I dreaded. I do have a neighbor who drops over some and has been helping me by mowing.
Anita
When I lived in a more commercial and centralized area I really enjoyed having friends stop by. I moved out in the suburbs to save money and mostly socialize online even though it isn’t the same. It takes about 2 hours for me to get downtown!
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