The Superbowl is behind us, and with March coming, Madness will soon keep us near the flat-screens. Shortly after that we’ll have The Opener.
All American sports… football, basketball, baseball… soccer, track, volleyball.
Great fun… but are sports good for life beyond the game? Can learning to play sports teach kids how to live life?
Tiger Ellison the Coach, Handing off a Legacy for Life Painting is framed, 34x40 inches, and hangs in the Glenn Tiger Ellison Sports Complex, Middletown, Ohio
I was raised in a football family
with a dad who taught life through his coaching and his teaching.
Tiger Ellison taught English, from writing to reading the classics, to self-expression through poetry and story, to learning about and developing unique creative ideas when they were needed.
And he coached football. No, more than that… he met young boys where they were, with their emerging manliness and guttural speech and raging energy, and he suited them up to learn how to play life.
So, first in the classroom; then on the gridiron.
He taught team work, memorizing play strategies, learning to think on their feet, creating ways to make it work when all hell threatened, getting up when knocked down, focusing on the goal instead of on the opponents who wanted to trounce them into oblivion. Making decisions for the good of the squad. Believing in the possibilities when the odds said impossible. Running the unexpected… these are what he taught.
Life lessons?
Yep. He used to ask: “When the chips are down and the jig is up and there’s hell to pay — will you pay it?”*
*Editing note* This was asked rhetorically in speeches he gave on leadership, on the field and off. Explained, it meant: When circumstances threaten, and there seems no way up and out of them, will you change directions and figure out another way to make it work and dig down to find the courage to do it?
Halfway through the football season my senior year our team had not scored a win. Four losses and one tie does not make a good season .
When the players walked the school halls with their heads down…
When those players were no longer having fun on the field, feeling defeated…
Tiger Ellison drove the long road home one night after practice and stopped to watch a bunch of grade-schoolers playing their own brand of football.
As he watched them run and throw wherever the defenders were not, a new offense began to take shape. With these youngsters’ very basic principle:
Line up non-traditionally, run several potential receivers down the field, and throw the ball where the defenders are not.
Was this possible within the accepted rules of high school football? They had nothing to lose by trying it, and everything to gain if they embraced it and made it work.
Which it did!
The new offense started life with ‘The Lonesome Polecat” play — named thus when one of the other coaches said it ‘stank.’ Well, stink it might, but it thrilled those kids… and they scored big their last 5 games against teams who didn’t know what hit them.
Our kids didn’t buckle under the ‘chips’ — they restacked them! And won!*
This year’s SuperBowl was a beautifully executed game — by both teams. I enjoyed every play. (Well, being a Colts fan, not the interception so much. But both teams were stellar, in my opinion. And, you gotta’ love a good passing game.)
I look forward to March Madness as well — our family get quite involved in dollar pools amongst ourselves. And we have so many athletes among our kids and grandkids. 
I believe — because I have lived with it all my life — that sports can play a major roll in teaching our kids how to live.
What’s your sport or game? How has it taught you to live?
Coffee’s hot… fill a mug and add whatever goodies make it yummy for you, and share your thoughts.
Thank you for coming by…
Barb
P.S. Patty Bechtold, a story-teller and blogger, tells a fun story about her Superbowl Sunday. And draws inferences to the contradictions of us humans. A very enjoyable read.
*Future teams refined the offense which became known as the Run and Shoot Football offense — now widely used in high schools, colleges, and the NFL.
In future posts, I’ll tell you where some of those players are now, and how their lives were affected by having had Tiger Ellison as a teacher and coach.
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
I’m a so-so sports fan during this season of my life. When I was attending high school, team sports were very limited for girls — the one that did accept girls was Track and Field, which I did attempt at a few practices before stopping — a combination of lack of perseverance and choice of working vs sport.
Our high school had a championship football team, and I have been intrigued to look at how the lives of the excellent players have taken different paths over the years. Much to be said for an experienced “life” coach like your dad. But once the stardom wore off, not all were able to make successes in their family and work life, and just a few would say that their high school glory days were their best. Mind you, my idea of “success” does not simply have to do with wealth or prestige or accomplishment, but with contentment and a legacy mindset. I imagine that these may have applied to your dad….
Sharon´s last blog ..Newly inspired…
Hi Sharon. Thanks for your very thoughtful comments.
Last night as I sat at a sell-out basketball game (my grandkids play) and listened to fans on both sides, I thought about the post I’d just written. There sat two of my sons-in-law, watching intently, quietly, commenting now and then, or chuckling at the officials’ calls. ‘Oops, he missed that one!’ was about as violent as they got. Both my ‘son-dears’ played sports — and still do — and one of them coaches. Both were raised with the same kind of philosophy my dad taught.
Then there were a handful of other fans — the ones who booed and ‘coached’ from the bleachers, yelling and hooting and even screaming. And I thought to myself, either they didn’t play sports themselves, or they played under demanding coaches for whom the win was the only thing.
I have watched the coaches on the sidelines for a long time. Some coach, encourage, revamp during the game, call send in players with plays and strategies they’d practiced during the week. Some coaches run up and down the floor screaming and swearing at their own team.
Not all coaches, nor even players, come through the sports experience with a life-defining philosophy to build on. But many do. Even as my sister went through two years of researching past players for her book, Coach the Kid, Build the Boy, Mold the Man, she found the disgruntled. But there were only a few compared to the many who took their lessons learned on the football field into life.
Yes, he did leave a legacy mindset. Thanks for coining that for me.
Great story here, Barb. Cool Dad! -k-
Thanks, Karol. Yes, he was… The most important lesson he left me was how he lived. (He never taught me what he didn’t live.)
Hi Barbara
“When the chips are down and the jig is up and there’s hell to pay — will you pay it?”
Wow… some quote, but I won’t use it on my daughter… she’s only six. LOL
Guess most talk of sport is about winning and working harder to win. But are we missing the point!
Surely life is about learning how to cope with a best than perfect outcome. You could say it is about learning how to lose, and still feel good.
A quote I remember from the film “Cool Runnings”
John Candy says…
“If your life’s no good without a gold medal, It won’t be any good with one.”
Too true, sport teaches us a lot about life.
Keith Davis´s last blog ..Practice, practice, practice…
Hi Keith.
You make a good point. The team that year certainly didn’t bring home any gold medals, nor did they have All State players. Nor did they win their conference title that year.
But still they won. They won at learning to change the strategies if what they were doing currently wasn’t working. They learned about possibilities and stepping out and taking risks and not giving up. They learned about choices and consequences.
I agree — not all life is about winning gold medals. Most of it is not. But it is about learning how to become your best, individually and within a community.
P.S. Haha… no, my dad didn’t preach to us either, not at age 6 nor ever. He just lived his life and we learned… Thanks so much for visiting.
Hi Barb,
I just poured myself a cup of coffee and grabbed one of those great looking cookies you have on that oval plate. Mmmm. Are these oatmeal with a touch of cinnamon?
I’m not from a sports family, although we did support our high school basketball team which took State a few times. Having said that, I do think we can learn from sports though. Things like teamwork, doing our best, being a good sport and not gloating when we win are universal to all of life.
P.S. Your Dad sounds like a super guy. How blessed you are to have had him in your life.
Barbara Swafford´s last blog ..Say It Ain’t So
Hi Barbara. Thank you — he was a super guy.
You have touched on the basics of all teaching, I think, with your list. Though I don’t think it’s taught across the board. My dad dedicated his life to teaching these principles through the vehicle he loved: football.
I never played football — hahaha — but the principles work for life.
Thanks for coming in. (I left a comment in Say It Ain’t So, but maybe it got caught in the spam?)
Hi Barb,
I just dug your comment out of spam. Thank you for the heads up.
Barbara Swafford´s last blog ..Say It Ain’t So
Thanks, Barbara. Strange, but it does happen.
BTW, I did comment a second time. Maybe you want to delete one of me???
Hi Barb – Oh, I loved reading this. You brought so much life to your dad’s story and how he inspired those boys. Beautiful! And thank you so much for the link love. I grew up with a mom who was a raging football and baseball fan, and I think what sport does for me, as an observer, is bring us to a collective place. A feeling of belonging, kinship. It’s quite wonderful, and I wish we had more of it in other ways in this country too.
Patty – Why Not Start Now?´s last blog ..Does the Truth Hurt?
Hi Patty. That’s a good observation — that healthy feeling of community and belonging. The thing is, there are many ‘collective places’ where we live pieces of our lives, and the attitudes my dad was so passionate about work in all of them.
Boy, I can really relate to the need to belong… I bet every one of us can!
Thanks so much for your comments. And you’re welcome for the link. I’m happy to have found your blog!
Beautiful post and points.
Sports are a breeding ground for life lessons. I think they’re a great way to learn teamwork, healthy attitude, humility, mental toughness, practice vs. performance, measuring your results, and continuous improvement.
J.D. Meier´s last blog ..Three D’s for Motivation – Direction, Decision, and Dedication
Hi J.D. Amen and Halleluia! Thanks for saying in a few words all that needed saying.
(And I took a whole post to say it. Haha!)
Barbara,
I loved this story about your dad and the “lonesome polecat play.” It’s obvious your dad was a wise and daring man; a man willing to take risks for what he believed in.
I’m a bit late to this post as I am now watching the Olympics, but what you said in the post applies here as well. I’m always amazed by the determination of the young kids that come to the Olympics, especially those that know from the get go that their chances of winning a medal are slim. Yet, they try and they try their best because that’s what they’ve been taught…by someone who, hopefully, is like your dad:~)
Sara´s last blog ..A Picture Story Guest Post
Hi Sara! Ahh yes — the Olympics. You know, even at the local level, whatever sports event is planned, whoever comes to participate — I count them all winners before the competition begins. They are there. Willing to risk and improve and maybe not come home with the blue ribbon or trophy or gold, but they’re there. Doing! And growing as a result.
I admire them all. And over the years I have refused to allow any of them (my kids and all others in my hearing) to call themselves losers. Nope. The win is in the attitude, the willingness to change and grow and keep on going. Finishing.
I ask my dad once if he thought we should be good losers if we didn’t win the game. His response was, ‘It takes practice to get good at anything. Do you want to be a good loser? A gracious one, yes, but good? Never!’
I liked that — and I still do.
Thank you for coming in and leaving your thoughtful comment!
My sport is rugby and it exemplifies the essence of team work.. There are 15 players on a side at the same time and each of them have a unique responsibility for defensive coverage and offensive ball advancement. I’ve never in any other sport witnessed a system like game that also creates frequent break downs where an individual can shine. I agree with your post. There is something about the body experience that puts us all in when playing sports.
Tom Volkar / Delightful Work´s last blog ..Courageous Individuality
Hi Tom.
Rugby is one of those sports whose name sounds like what it is. I love that word! It’s football, inside out and upside down, without padded protection. Soccer with a football. Only it’s its own game — I’ll bet the fans rarely sit down.
What a fun game to watch!
Your involvement in rugby has certainly helped prepare you for the life coaching you do. Thanks so much for your input here.
I have fallen in love with your father from your words here. I was blessed to have two instructors in high school that gave me those kind of life lessons, and Dr. Lehman and Miss Sitterly will never be forgotten by me. I’m sure your father’s effect was strong in many of his students and some for their entire lives. I loved playing sports but in “my” day a young lady didn’t do such things…they just made the wrong assumption about me;O)
Suzie´s last blog ..Windows 7 help forum
Thank you, Suzie! In re-vamping this post for the beginning of the 2011 season, I found your comment.
I too have just a couple teachers — besides my parents — who still stand out from my early years. If only we all realized how little it takes, really, to uplift and encourage someone in a way that remains memorable for a life-time. Sports beyond the then-acceptable tennis for girls began its climb as soon as I was out of high school. Basketball went from half-court defenders and half-court forwards to full-court, like-the-boys-play basketball the following year. My younger sister played the game as it is today, more or less. But I do know what you mean — other than those two sports, ladies just did not participate. Can you imagine a woman pole vaulter? 
Woman’s track did not begin in our state for a few more years. I too love sports.
Barb
Love this post. I think I wish I had your dad
Sliloh´s last blog ..Mindfulness
Thank you, Anita. I was blessed with my parents…….
And I don’t take it for granted.
Barb
Hi Barb, just read your post & it almost brought tears to my eyes. I was one of the boys on that losing team. However because of Tiger the world of football got the “Lonesome Polecat” & we became winners, winning the last 5 games including beating our all time rivals Hamilton High School i think by 1 point. At the time i was the smallest first string guard ever for the Middletown Middies 157# senior, playing both offence & defence. The radio announcer called me Little Jerry Wells, Tiger called me Blue Block Wells, (when you got your block or made a tackle Tiger would give you a blue check mark by you name). At every game on the field before the coin toss Tiger would put his hands on my shoulders & say “it’s not the size of the dog in the fight it’s the size of the fight in the dog, you got it Wellsy”. Yes sir, i said. Stan Lewis: “Rattle his pads the first play & he is yours the rest of the game”. It took me tell later in life to learn why when i wanted to do something i could not be stopped. When i meet resistance i would figure out how to go around it, over it, under it or through it, but getter done. When i was 23 i wanted to build a house & put it on the market for sale. All my co-workers at Armco, family & friends told me i was crazy & could not do it so young. Well i did & sold the house to the finance manager of Project 600 at the new Amrco Steel plant. It was Tiger that gave me courage to do that. My dad was drunk most of my young life & Tiger was my make believe dad. You were so blessed. I only tell you these stories to brag on Tiger not to brag on me. I can’t imagine who i would be without his encouragement in my life.